As the weather gets cooler and the leaves start to change color, it’s clear that fall has arrived. It’s a time for cozy sweaters, dark windy nights, and pumpkin-flavored everything. To add some humor and positivity to the season, here are 35 short and funny fall quotes that are sure to bring a smile to your face.
“Autumn is a season followed immediately by looking forward to spring.” – Doug Larson
“The heat of autumn is different from the heat of summer. One ripens apples, the other turns them to cider.” – Jane Hirshfield
“Some say fall is the season when the leaves change. I say it’s the season when my sweat pants never change.” – Katie Nicole Felton
“Summer makes me drowsy. Autumn makes me sing. Winter’s pretty lousy, but I hate Spring.” – Dorothy Parker
“I would rather sit on a pumpkin, and have it all to myself, than be crowded on a velvet cushion.” – Henry David Thoreau
“The autumn wind is a pirate. Blustering in from sea with a rollicking song he sweeps along swaggering boisterously.” – Steve Sabol
“It’s like going back to school. You know, autumn! Time for ‘Harry Potter’.” – Robbie Coltrane
“Halloween is right around the corner. You can tell because all the stores are decked out for Christmas.” – Stephen Colbert
“My Halloween costume was so bad that people opened their doors and took candy from me.” – Glen Nesbit
“In autumn, don’t go to jewelers to see gold; go to the parks!” – Mehmet Murat Ildan
“Autumn leaves are falling, filling up the streets; golden colors on the lawn, nature’s trick or treat!” – Rusty Fischer
“During the day, I don’t believe in ghosts. At night, I’m a little more open-minded.” – Unknown
“If I were a bird, I would fly about the Earth seeking the successive autumns.” – George Eliot
“It’s like summer wear the world out, and by October everyone is just ready for a nap.” – Ta-Nehisi Coates
“Autumn is the hardest season. The leaves are all falling, and they’re falling like they’re falling in love with the ground.” – Andrea Gibson
“If you’re ever wondering what to wear, just dress like a pumpkin, you’re good to go.” – Devendra Banhart
“If money really did grow on trees, in fall we’d all be raking it in.” – Unknown
“I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.” – L.M. Montgomery
“Bittersweet October. The mellow, messy, leaf-kicking, perfect pause between the opposing miseries of summer and winter.” – Carol Bishop Hipps
Short, Witty and Hilarious Fall Quotes for a Laugh and Less Stress
“Fall: when the trees turn into exhibitionists and show off their colors.” – Anna Madsen
“Fall is proof that even leaves can look good in orange – so there’s hope for us all.” – Unknown
“Love the trees until their leaves fall off, then encourage them to try again next year.” – Chad Sugg
“Every day is Halloween, isn’t it? For some of us.” – Tim Burton
“Falling for autumn and not getting up.” – Unknown
“Kinda spooky that Halloween has never fallen on Friday the 13th.” – Stephen Colbert
“I’ll stop wearing black when they make a darker color.” – Wednesday Addams
“It’s all just a bunch of hocus pocus.” – Max, Hocus Pocus
“Sticky fingers, tired feet; one last house, trick or treat!” – Rusty Fischer
“I’m falling for fall like a clumsy leaf off a tree.” – Unknown
“I see my face in the mirror and go, ‘I’m a Halloween costume? That’s what they think of me?’” – Drew Carey
“Autumn carries more gold in its pocket than all the other seasons.” – Jim Bishop
“Halloween is the only time people can become what they want to be without getting fired.” – Sylvester Stallone
“A person should always choose a costume which is in direct contrast to her own personality.” – Lucy Van Pelt
“Things are never quite as scary when you’ve got a best friend.” – Bill Waterson
“If you want to scare your boyfriend next Halloween, come dressed as what he fears most. Commitment.” – Peter Nelson
“Every October I’m kidnapped and forced to scare birds at a local pumpkin patch.” – Conan O’Brien
Looking for more fall inspiration and laughs? Check out these short and beautiful October quotes, the funny Halloween quotes in this post, and some inspirational fall quotes to keep the season bright and cheerful.