You thought you had it all figured out. The grades. The internships. The grind. You adhered to the guidelines and sought success, perhaps even achieving a commendable version of it. To an outsider, your life appears perfect. Yet now, despite ticking all the boxes, thereâs an unsettling feeling⊠something just doesnât sit right.
Itâs not that youâre burnt out. Youâre not bitter or ungrateful. Yet, thereâs an internal dissonance thatâs persistently tugging at you, an incessant urge thatâs hard to ignore.
What youâre sensing? Itâs likely your inner spark yearning to be acknowledged.
Perhaps youâve suppressed a fragment of yourself to streamline your existence. At times, that concession is manageable. But frequently, the part we stifle is integral to our identity. When we silence it, our vitality fades as well.
Years ago, I faced a similar crossroads. I was entrenched in a prestigious legal position, and after accruing six figures in law school debt, I took a leap into uncertainty.
When people questioned my departure, I instinctively placed my hands over my heart and responded, âI felt my light fading. I vowed never to let that happen again.â
That story isnât solely mine; itâs increasingly representative of a larger narrative.
According to the Gallup State of the Global Workplace, only 31% of employees in the U.S. were engaged at work in 2024, the lowest level in a decade. globally, engagement has dipped to 21%.
This growing trend, dubbed âThe Great Gloom,â signifies widespread emotional flatness, manifesting as disengagement, dwindling morale, and a troubling disconnection between purpose and performance.
Maybe youâre one of the fortunate ones, flourishing in complete harmony. For many, however, it may only be a fleeting glimpseâa certain presence that some individuals carry. The way they enter a room, whole and fully alive. Captivating.
What you observe isnât merely charisma or confidence. Itâs alignmentâa state wherein an individualâs energy, values, intuition, and drive converge harmoniously.
When you frequently override your alignment, when success morphs into mere survival, and performance replaces genuine feeling, the repercussions are cumulative.
Thus, the vital question bifurcates: How can you recognize when your light is dimming? And how can you nurture it back to brilliance?
Begin by noticing what feels amiss
Sometimes, it hits you all at once. You wake up and realize youâre succeeding in a version of life that no longer resonates with your true self. Other times, itâs a gradual fade; you keep functioning, yet a part of you begins to withdraw.
When that sensation arises, the instinct is often to pinpoint it and articulate exactly whatâs lacking before enacting change. However, you need not define what ignites your light perfectly to recognize when something is dulling it.
Instead of seeking clarity, start by acknowledging contrasts.
Hereâs what that may look like practically:
Be aware of instances of emotional dissonance. If something feels absurd, pointless, or misaligned, donât dismiss it. That discomfort is informative.
For example: I realized I couldnât design my life in a system where someoneâs greatest achievement was negotiating an extraterrestrial invasion clause in a commercial agreement.
Pay attention to both your physical and emotional reactions. Misalignment often manifests subtly before your conscious mind catches up. Start noticing:
- Do you feel exhausted even after a full nightâs sleep?
- Is your energy scattered or uneasy, as opposed to steady and focused?
- Are you merely going through the motions without a sense of connection to your actions?
For me, every moment spent there after that realization felt like imprisonment. My body recognized it before I allowed myself to voice it.
Question the significance of the work youâre doing. Ask yourself: If I were to dedicate the next decade to this, who would it shape me into? Would it guide me toward the person I aspire to be?
And take noteâdo you find yourself envious of others engaging in âless importantâ but more joyous work?
Acknowledging these signs is the initial step. But recognizing them is merely the beginning: the real effort lies in making a change.
Five strategies to advocate for your light
Here are five actionable methods to initiate this journey.
1. Understand that you donât need to completely dismantle everything. Advocating for your light doesnât necessitate quitting your job or radically transforming your life overnight. Itâs about awakening. Reclaiming your autonomy. Reshaping the rulesâyour rulesâeven if you must navigate within existing frameworks.
Itâs a transition from autopilot to deliberate intention. This transition begins with small, intentional gestures that help you reconnect with who you are and what genuinely matters to you.
I took the plunge into the unknown once, but since then, Iâve learned to recalibrate, balancing the essence I bring with the demands of my ambitions.
2. Tune in to that subtle nudge. That persistent, nagging feeling? Itâs yearning for your acknowledgment. Itâs your instinct, your essence, urging you to return home. Rather than ignoring it, take the time to sit with it. Reflect: What part of myself have I muted in order to sustain this life?
3. Engage in micro soul work. Thereâs no need to board a flight to Bali or completely reinvent your identity. Dedicate 10 minutes each day to reconnect with the essence of who you are beyond societal expectations. This might entail:
- Examining the projects you voluntarily undertake; is there a recurring theme?
- Journaling about past experiences that sparked joy and passion
- Sitting in silence with a question like: What am I tolerating?
- Moving your body without any specific objectiveâjust for the sake of curiosity and connection.
4. Articulate the unspoken rules youâre still following. Jot them down:
- âCreativity is not for me.â
- âIâm only valuable when Iâm productive.â
- âI must wear formal attire to receive respect.â
Then challenge them. Are these realities? Who established these regulations? Are they serving you, or are they constraining you?
5. Reignite your creative courage. Creativity embodies the soulâs expression. If you aim to rediscover your light, start here. And if your default thought is, âIâm not creative,â refer back to #4.
Initiate with something minor, tangible, and meant solely for you. Gradually broaden your scope. The goal is to start proving to yourself that your light isnât extinguished; it simply requires room to flourish.
Emancipation doesnât always imply escaping. At times, it signifies expansion.
The true endeavor isnât to pursue that light but to consistently return to it, until it transcends being a destination and becomes your everyday reality.