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American Focus > Blog > Education > Help! How Do I Balance Being Firm Yet Kind With Students?
Education

Help! How Do I Balance Being Firm Yet Kind With Students?

Last updated: April 18, 2025 8:55 am
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Help! How Do I Balance Being Firm Yet Kind With Students?
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As a third-year teacher facing the challenge of finding the balance between being firm and kind with students, it’s important to consider the concept of being a “warm demander.” This term, coined by Judith Kleinfeld and expanded on by Lisa Delpit, emphasizes the importance of expecting a great deal from students while also convincing them of their own brilliance in a disciplined and structured environment.

Reflecting on your own experiences with trusted adults or mentors who helped you grow can provide valuable insights into how to strike this balance authentically. Setting clear boundaries and modeling respect for students is essential for creating a positive and effective learning environment. It’s also important to co-create standards with students and ensure that they understand and follow these guidelines.

Seeking clarity from your AP on the specific actions or behaviors that led to their feedback can help you make targeted improvements. Reflecting on the changes you made between observations and identifying what worked well for students can guide you in finding the right balance between firmness and kindness.

In terms of managing workload and avoiding taking work home, it’s important to acknowledge the reality that many teachers work beyond contract hours. While leaving work at work is a good goal, it may not always be feasible. Utilizing time management strategies, optimizing planning periods, and streamlining grading processes can help make the most of your time during the school day.

Consider incorporating peer review, self-assessment, and formative assessments to reduce the amount of time spent on grading. Focus on using student feedback and data to inform your instruction, rather than grading every assignment in detail. Remember that it’s okay to ask for support and seek help from colleagues, mentors, or instructional coaches when needed.

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If you feel that you would benefit from more hands-on support from your coach, don’t hesitate to communicate your needs and preferences. Co-teaching, modeling practices, and receiving live feedback can be valuable ways to enhance your professional growth. Remember that seeking support is a sign of strength and a willingness to improve.

In conclusion, navigating the challenges of teaching and professional development requires a combination of self-reflection, effective communication, and a willingness to seek support when needed. By prioritizing the well-being of both yourself and your students, you can strive to find a balance that fosters a positive and productive learning environment.

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