Laverne Cox recently shared insights into the “blessings” of being a trans woman, highlighting how it can shield individuals from narcissistic men.
In an exclusive interview with Us Weekly while promoting her newly released memoir, Transcendent, Cox, 54, remarked, “Being trans has really helped me with the Hollywood thing and not getting too full of myself.” She elaborated on how it keeps her grounded, noting that many famous figures, such as athletes, rappers, and actors, have shown interest in her but wouldn’t date her publicly because she is trans.
Cox further explained, “My transness has protected me from a lot of things that a lot of other women experience in Hollywood that aren’t good things — like a lot of narcissistic men. Rejection is really God’s protection.”
The memoir also delves into Cox’s challenging childhood and her journey toward finding healing and safety as a Black trans woman in Hollywood. A crucial component of her growth has been learning to establish healthy boundaries and at times, distancing herself from potentially toxic individuals, including men.
She shared with Us, “Loving myself is about going to the doctor, eating, getting enough sleep, but also the people, places and things. Who am I surrounding myself with? Do I have people in my life who suck me dry, who make me feel bad about myself, who trigger my patterns and, if these people aren’t serving me, I need to let go of those people.”
She emphasized the importance of releasing certain toxic individuals who might revive past traumas or lack healthy boundaries.
During a discussion on The New York Times “Modern Love” podcast, Cox recounted the difficulty of parting ways with her boyfriend of nearly four years. She discovered he was a NYPD officer who had voted for President Donald Trump three times. “I was in sheer bliss with this man and you know, things would come up and we would agree to disagree about some political things,” Cox said. Despite finding some political views problematic but not offensive, she tried to understand his perspective, acknowledging the influence of his upbringing and the information he consumed.
In her conversation with Us, Cox reflected on her relationship with the officer, revealing her realization of a “soul connection” that transcends politics. However, she acknowledged the significance of political beliefs, especially when they have implications for marginalized communities.
She elaborated, “I do believe that there is, like, a spiritual realm connection that we have that’s beyond politics and in history, but those things are material reality, right? Like, they inform who we are. I wasn’t able to build in a relationship and build a life with him because of his politics, but that doesn’t negate the soul connection, right?”
She concluded by discussing the difference between social constructs and the reality of discrimination, noting, “Those two things are different — things that are social constructs, like me being a Black trans woman is only really relevant because of discrimination that Black trans people experience. Wouldn’t it be lovely if we could live in a colorblind, genderless world? But we can’t because of oppression.”
