Navigating the Challenges of Modern Adolescence: Insights from Matt Richtel’s How We Grow Up

Social media can bombard adolescents with people to judge themselves harshly against. (Image credit: Alys Tomlinson/Getty Images)

How We Grow Up
Matt Richtel (Mariner Books)

The opening narrative of How We Grow Up, written by Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist Matt Richtel, is distressing for parents with children approaching adolescence. It tells the story of Elaniv, an exuberant girl whose life spiraled into deep depression as she entered puberty. A once cheerful child became overwhelmed, struggling to focus and feeling increasingly isolated. Tragically, despite various treatments and familial support, Elaniv took her own life. Her father’s poignant reflection – “I did the very best I could for my daughter” – underscores the profound challenges many parents face today.

In his compelling exploration, Richtel examines the roots of what appears to be a mental health crisis among adolescents. He combines compelling interviews, scientific research, and historical context to paint a vivid portrait of the overwhelming challenges that confront young people as they transition to adulthood in the modern world. This book notably raises questions about the implications of early puberty coupled with the complex realities of today’s societal pressures.

Adolescence, fundamentally linked to the onset of puberty, coincides with significant neurological changes that can lead to increased rebelliousness and emotional turmoil. Richtel highlights research indicating that adolescence is beginning earlier and extending longer than it has in previous generations. For instance, children in the U.S. are experiencing the onset of puberty approximately four years earlier than they did two centuries ago. The average age for girls to have their first menstrual period has decreased from 14 to 12 since 1900, largely attributed to improved nutrition and health.

As the context of the world has transformed, the avenues for adolescent rebellion have changed too. Where physical rebellions might have once taken precedence, today’s struggles are more cerebral, steeped in identity and ethical dilemmas largely played out online. As a result, an ever-increasing number of interactions occurs in digital spaces filled with scrutinizing peers, amplifying feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.

Although there have been notable declines in binge drinking and drunk-driving incidents among teens, which Richtel attributes to a reduced focus on the outward world, there are alarming trade-offs. The decline in physical activity, increased rates of loneliness, and interrupted social networks due to the COVID-19 pandemic further complicate the emotional landscape for adolescents—a demographic that relies heavily on in-person interactions to nurture emotional intelligence.

Richtel argues that this divergence creates a scenario where adolescents’ bodies mature quicker than their emotional and cognitive abilities can keep pace. While many young individuals navigate this period without severe repercussions, the balance of online interactions can vary widely, influencing their mental health in inconsistent, often detrimental, ways.

Specifically, How We Grow Up posits that social media acts as a “volume knob,” amplifying existing emotional states rather than creating them. One interviewee, who experienced early biological changes at just ten years old, reflected insightfully, stating, “I feel like if I was born in 2000 BC in the Alps, I’d still be depressive, but I think it’s wildly exacerbated by the climate we live in,” offering a testament to the exacerbating effects of modern life.

Richtel’s work is at once scary and enlightening. It confronts the realities of adolescence head-on while providing insights into how these challenges might be mitigated by understanding their nature—both for young people and their parents. The evolutionary purpose of adolescent rebellion becomes clearer, emphasizing its role not only in establishing independence but also in shaping the future that the next generation will inhabit.

Chris Simms is a writer based in Somerset, UK.

Need Help?

If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out for support. In the UK, you can contact Samaritans at 116123 or visit samaritans.org. In the U.S., the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is available at 988 or visit 988lifeline.org. For a comprehensive list of international resources, visit here.

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Topics:

• Adolescence
• Mental Health
• Social Media
• Puberty
• Parenting Tips

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