Ben Stiller has shared insights into his experiences and errors as a father of two.
Reflecting on his parenting journey, the 59-year-old Stiller remarked, “Like any parent, I have memories of difficult times from my childhood and thought, ‘I’ll do things differently.'” He conveyed this in an interview with The Sunday Times, published on October 11, as he discussed the lessons learned from his late parents, Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara.
Stiller continued, “I came to the realization that it was impossible to sidestep the mistakes they made. I feel a strong connection with my children, but it’s a complex relationship that has been tested at times. In their younger years, I didn’t fully grasp the importance of being present. I thought, ‘These kids are small; I can concentrate on my work and still be a provider.’ However, the connections made during their early years are crucial.”
The actor shares a daughter, Ella, 23, and a son, Quinn, 20, with his wife, fellow actress Christine Taylor. He acknowledged that his relationship with his late parents, who passed away in 2015 and 2020, was complex, primarily due to their Hollywood careers that often took precedence over family time.
“It certainly impacted us,” he recalled, reflecting on his parents’ careers that involved late-night performances and extended trips. “I remember terribly missing them. When they returned home, my sister and I would entertain them by performing Jesus Christ Superstar in the living room.”
He added, “Yet, I might have made more mistakes with my kids than my parents did with us.”
The Dodgeball star recounted the experience of casting Ella in The Secret Life of Walter Mitty—a film Ben directed—before deciding to cut her scene. “My son often tells me that being a dad didn’t seem to be my main focus,” he recalled while shaking his head in disbelief.
He also reminisced about the challenges during his separation from Christine from 2017 to 2020, noting that it was tough for their children.
“That time apart put a significant strain on my relationship with the kids,” Stiller reflected. “I often thought, ‘My parents never did that to us.’ Long-term relationships can lose their spark. I genuinely regret how our separation affected the kids, yet it may have been beneficial for both Christine and me.”
Ben discussed his struggles during his estrangement in the documentary Stiller & Meara: Nothing Is Lost, which premiered on October 5 at the New York Film Festival. “My career had been progressing, but I felt disconnected and unhappy, struggling to find balance in my personal life, including my relationship with my children,” he shared in the film, according to People.
