Building a Life Abroad—and Finding the American Dream

Each morning, my phone buzzes with messages from friends, often sent just before they turn in for the night. These texts, filled with questions and concerns, highlight a growing unease. “What type of visa did you apply for? Can we chat tomorrow?”

“Absolutely,” I reply. “How about 9 a.m. your time, which is 5 p.m. for me?”

Following a near-total upheaval during the Great Recession—losing my job, car, apartment, and most of our savings—my future husband and I embraced a radical departure from traditional living. We relocated into a converted cargo van and began our journey as “economic migrants,” ultimately traversing through 25 countries while managing a small online business focused on outdoor recreation gear. Fast forward to today, and our family has settled in a lovely home in Spain, where our 12-year-old daughter thrives.

Over the years, fielding inquiries about expat life has become second nature to me. However, lately, the tone has shifted. My friends, who haven’t vacationed since before the pandemic, now voice their worries about healthcare cuts, escalating insurance premiums, and the struggles of homeownership. Many feel trapped by financial burdens, unable to afford down payments or grappling with mortgage debt incurred to assist their children’s education, who, in turn, are facing a job market that offers little hope.

This growing sense of disenchantment reveals a troubling trend—the American dream seems more elusive for many. In fact, a recent Harris Poll indicated that around 40% of Americans are contemplating emigration, a sentiment echoed across various social media platforms. A brief browse reveals an abundance of YouTube channels and TikTok videos featuring cheerful expatriates enjoying life in Spain—sipping cava in bustling tapas bars and strolling along picturesque cobblestone streets. They tout how you, too, can “live your best life” for as little as 1,000 euros a month.

Yet, the reality of relocation is far more complex than it appears on social media. My friends’ inquiries extend beyond mere questions about the cost of living or where to enjoy the best local cuisine. They seek genuine empathy and hope, knowing that I can understand their struggles, having faced similar challenges myself.

Since our move to Spain in the fall of 2016, the American dream has taken on a different shape for my family. What we initially anticipated didn’t quite line up with our experiences. Like many millennials, I grew up with the understanding that hard work would eventually lead to a luxurious life defined by lavish homes and fancy cars. Unfortunately, that vision has fallen short for me and countless others. Instead, in Spain, we’ve discovered a fulfilling middle-class existence—one where many of the pressures that weigh down my friends feel significantly lighter.